


Hope

by orphan_account



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Brief Kissing, Canon Character Injury, Fluff, Grief, Hurt/Comfort, Interlude, M/M, Pre-Relationship, not quite canon compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-10
Updated: 2017-08-10
Packaged: 2018-12-13 19:13:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11766516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: “I’ve run,” Poe said, then laughed.  “I don’t run anymore.  But I have in the past.  People have gotten hurt because I gave into my fear, and…and it never feels good.  I get it, man.  I do.  We’re going to get her back.”“You can’t promise that,” Finn said roughly.Poe shrugged.  “No.  I can’t promise that.  I can’t promise we’ll all be alive in a few hours to board our ships, but I can hope.  And that’s all I’ve got.  It has to be enough.”





	Hope

**Author's Note:**

> I mean...this could have happened, I suppose. Let's just go with it, shall we? 
> 
> I'm writing a longer StormPilot tattoo shop AU ft a bunch of characters from Rogue One cos I love them too much to ever leave them out. This was just helping me get some feels out, plus I watched TFA last night before bed and I was just feeling all the StormPilot. Gearing up for the new film soon and all that.

There was always a sort of intensity the moment before they shipped out, and the gravity of this situation felt heavier than normal. Poe was no fool, he understood what was on the line, and understood a lot of them weren’t coming back. He knew the rebel history, he knew how many willingly lost everything to their cause—he was one of those people. His parents had been those people, and he wondered if maybe the weight of his grief over his mother would have been lighter if she’d given her life for the cause instead of ripped away by illness. He supposed, in a way, having some control over your own death made all the difference.

He also supposed that’s why Finn sat alone outside, his face turned up at a patch of stars that could be seen under the jungle canopy. He could see the worry and grief playing out on Finn’s face. In the short time Poe had known him, it was obvious Finn couldn’t hold much back, not when it came to people he cared about. Finn attached easily—whether that was the by-product of breaking his conditioning, or if he’d just been born that way, Poe didn’t think they’d ever really know. But he liked him.

Poe hesitated before joining him. In reality, he should have been heading to his bunk for sleep, but anxiety was humming in his veins. There was so much to come and they were leaving in hours to disable the base, if not destroy it completely. The plan had so many flaws, all Poe could see was failure, but he held on to hope, because without it, he would be lost. He thought maybe, at least just sitting with Finn, would offer the other man a little comfort.

Finn didn’t startle when Poe approached, only turning his head slightly at the sound of Poe’s boots on the soft ground. They were only a few feet away from the tarmac, but the way the jungle grew on D’qar, just a few feet from pavement could feel like an entirely new world.

“When we got to Takodana, you should have seen her face,” Finn said, his voice barely carrying over the light breeze rustling the leaves above them. He waited to speak again until Poe settled on the ground. “She’d never…I don’t think she’d ever seen water like that before. Or green, growing things. At least, if she had, she didn’t remember it. It was like…” He let out a puff of air, dragging one hand down his face, then he laughed, the sound vaguely bitter. “I don’t know what it was like. I don’t think I’ve seen wonder on anyone’s face like that.”

Poe shifted, so his shoulder brushed against Finn’s.

“Someone that enthralled with something as simple as a forest shouldn’t have been taken. She didn’t…she’s not…” He swallowed. “She can take care of herself. I’ve seen it. She pulled my ass out of the fire over and over.” His head bowed toward his knees, and his hands clenched into fists. “I left her.”

“You didn’t,” Poe began, but Finn shook his head roughly.

“I left her. I was in that stupid bar, and I was afraid and I let it…” He licked his lips. “I would have left. If it hadn’t all gone down the way it did, I would have left.”

“No one blames you for that,” Poe said.

Finn made a noise of disbelief as he turned his head, eyes searching Poe’s face for truth. It was there, plain on his features, and Finn’s eyes widened. “You…”

“I’ve run,” Poe said, then laughed. “I don’t run anymore. But I have in the past. People have gotten hurt because I gave into my fear, and…and it never feels good. I get it, man. I do. We’re going to get her back.”

“You can’t promise that,” Finn said roughly.

Poe shrugged. “No. I can’t promise that. I can’t promise we’ll all be alive in a few hours to board our ships, but I can hope. And that’s all I’ve got. It has to be enough.”

Finn dug his teeth into his bottom lip, then said, “Why’d you give me a name?”

Poe’s eyes widened. “What?”

“Look, I know I helped you, but you know it was for selfish reasons. I just…wanted out. I didn’t want to join the resistance, I didn’t want to fight the First Order. I just wanted out. I just…needed a pilot.”

“And you got one.”

Poe nudged Finn who gave into a small smile. “I guess I did.”

“And Finn…you deserve a name. You don’t have to save the world to deserve an identity. I know what they do to get their army. I know who they…I know where the storm troopers come from. You’re more than that. You’re more than a serial number, Finn.”

Finn glanced down, a shaking sigh escaping his chest. “I don’t remember a lot, growing up. But we were people sometimes.”

Poe felt something sticky and heavy in his gut, and a desire to reach out and touch, to smooth away the wrinkles over Finn’s forehead, to brush his thumb over his bottom lip, to kiss him…

And that was not new. Poe had felt it in the moments they were in the ship together, from the sheer joy in Finn’s voice when Poe ripped away the last vestiges of Finn’s First Order identity. Poe often fell hard and fast. He recalled the joy rushing through him when he looked across the tarmac and saw Finn there in his jacket. The warm feel of him pressed against his chest in their momentary embrace.

“You’re staring,” Finn said.

Poe’s cheeks flushed. “Sorry. You’re very…attractive. It’s hard not to.”

Finn’s face fell blank, eyes widening a fraction the only thing giving his expression away. It was strange to see him like that. “I…”

“Sorry. I let my mouth get ahead of me too much sometimes and…”

His words died out when Finn raised a hand, touching it soft and gingerly to Poe’s cheek. There was stubble there, from days in flight and without rest. He could feel the pads of Finn’s fingers catching on it. He sucked in his breath when Finn’s thumb ran against the corner of his mouth.

“You’ve…have you…” Poe said, a rare loss for words.

Finn’s mouth quirked. “Yeah. But um maybe…I mean we have so much to do and with Rey…”

Poe nodded, ignoring the flood of disappointment because he understood. He more than understood. When Finn didn’t pull his hand away, though, Poe curled his fingers round his wrist, and leant in. “When we get back,” he promised. “When we get back and she’s safe here…come and find me.”

_If I make it out alive_ , went unspoken, but they both knew.

Finn nodded, his eyes closing. They shared a breath between them, then Finn leant in and let his mouth brush over Poe’s, a light, soft push before pulling away. Poe’s breath felt punched out of him, his fingers holding Finn’s wrist tight to hide the fact they were shaking.

“We’re gonna do this,” he muttered, echoing some of the first words he’d ever spoken to Finn. “You and me, buddy. We’re gonna do this. We’re gonna get home safe.”

*** 

Safe. Maybe if he’d been more specific, he wouldn’t be staring at Finn emerged lying on a bacta table with the med droid telling him he wasn’t sure how bad the damage would be until he came out. Maybe Finn would have run off the ship. Maybe Han…

Poe closed his eyes, and ran the tips of his fingers over Finn’s limp hand. He heard a noise behind him, and turned to see Rey there, worry etched all over her face. She was as bad as hiding how she felt as Finn was, and it made his chest ache for them both.

“He’s going to make it,” Poe said. His words echoed strangely, too close to what he’d been saying to Finn not long ago.

Rey swallowed thickly. “Yeah I…that’s what they said. I mean, there’s a chance that…but yeah. No. He’ll be alright. He’s the strongest one of us.”

Poe couldn’t help his smile, couldn’t help but reach for where he knew Finn’s pulse was still thrumming under the skin on his wrist. It was soothing, to feel it, to be reminded Finn was still alive. He’d wake up. “Yeah, he is.”

“You’ll take care of him whilst I’m gone, won’t you?” she said, her tone almost begging. “I know you erm. You mean something to him. He gets a look on his face when he talks about you.”

Poe couldn’t help his soft laugh. “I’m not going anywhere. I promise. Not until you get back. He’s got me.”

“Okay I…good. That’s good. D’you mind if I…”

Poe gently released Finn’s hand, his fingers peeling away like a stubborn plaster, but he did it. He’d have time, and Rey was…well, she was leaving. She was going to find Luke and Poe knew that wasn’t going to be an easy task. Poe knew what she faced, and what she was hoping to find. He wished desperately that he could promise her that Luke would be happy to see her, that he would be willing to give her what she needed.

“You go ahead, sweetheart. I have a few things to do, but I’ll be back to check on him later. Promise me you’ll do your best to stay safe.”

She smiled, her cheeks colouring with a faint blush, and she made a noise of surprise when he pulled her into a hug and kissed the side of her hair.

“He’d be devastated if you didn’t,” Poe pointed out.

She breathed in, letting it out slowly, her arms tightening, then slowly releasing him. “I know,” she said. “I’ll do my best. Always do.”

He grinned at her, gave her cheek a fond pat, and then walked out. One glance back saw her leaning over him, her mouth moving in a slow whisper. Finn probably couldn’t hear them now, but maybe something would stick, wedge its way into his subconscious and comfort him until he was finally allowed to wake up. It was nothing more than a hope, but right now, that was all they’ve got.

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to come and yell at me (or send me star wars prompt ideas or head canons) at my tumblr [angryspace-ravenclaw](https://angryspace-ravenclaw.tumblr.com). It's mostly Check, Please, Star Wars, Harry Potter, and random, salty content.


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